Nooooo - They Defrosted Mariah!!!

Dare we say it - the C word?

Christmas is just around the corner, and unprepared is without a doubt the biggest understatement ever in the history of the season!

I don't know about you all, but the Reece/Browell house are so not ready for this. From Santa to naughty elves to presents, markets and mulled wine, is the season really all its cracked up to be or has it turned into a commercial pain in the ass of epic proportions?!

Thank goodness I finally got that off my chest!

So, here I am. Its 2:44 in the morning and I can't sleep.

Although I got the naughty elves out ready for their arrival today to monitor the behaviour in the house coming up to that word we dare not say, I can't find them.

The 1st December may actually be elfless and that is just not cricket folks!

Maybe its a mum thing, I can't be too sure, but what I see with the men in my life is a total chill out attitude towards Christmas. I don't know about the rest of you, but from a mum's point of view, from the moment they defrost the Christmas banshee, (AKA Mariah), the panic begins to bubble beneath the surface and this year musers, the first Crimbo song I heard on the radio was broadcast on the 7th November.

(Let me say that again, just in case you missed it).

7th NOVEMBER!!!

Unsurprisingly it was the banshee herself!

Thank you 7yr old Lucy from Manchester for kickstarting the Christmas craziness so much earlier than was necessary! From that moment, all I have been able to think was - 'Its only just been last Christmas. Where has the year gone?"

I am assured by my work wives that this is going to happen every year. One of the symptoms of getting older is time flying past way quicker than you want it to.

I keep telling myself that surely there is no way that its actually been almost a full year since last Christmas. Someone has to be pulling my leg! So, when Lucy from Manchester started the defrost process, that was it.

The Christmas panic started to set in.

This year the vibe is very different to the last few years.

For those of you have been here since day one, you all know Christmas has been difficult for the last few years. It had become a time of year that I absolutely dreaded, and as someone who absolutely loved the hustle and bustle, that was a strange reality to be faced with.

I always thought as large child and small child grew up, I would be able to relax and enjoy the build up more because there wouldn't be all the things to do that you have to do to make Christmas magical when your people are little.

Do you know what I found out though musers?

Without those things, its actually a bit pants.

You go from creating personalised Santa videos, having fun setting up christmas elves and writing magic spells for reindeer dust to just sitting with a glass of prosecco on Christmas Eve counting the minutes until bedtime. Not even Love Actually cut it last year!

The thing is, what I began to realise is that I wasn't making their Christmas. In actual fact, they were making mine. It was those priceless little moments that made Christmas. I may have facilitated them, but actually, every little thing they did brought the season kicking and screaming into my December.

I still remember Alex's face when he got his first Santa video. The absolute look of disbelief and excitement to see Santa talking directly to him was pure magic. I managed to get him to 11 before he completely gave up on the idea of Santa because of those videos.

He didn't want to take the risk of not believing before he became too sensible for Santa!

I loved creating Elf chaos around the house for them throughout December, although I have to say, our elves were the very definition of naughty.

From playing poker and beer pong to lighting their farts and wrapping the toilet in wrapping paper, they made life very interesting during December.

The kids always looked forward to seeing what new madness had been caused through the night!

I remember the year me and Chase attempted to make a gingerbread house.

Lets just say, demolition was not necessary! The gingerbread was delicious though which definitely made up for the fact that nobody could have lived in it.

Out of everything though, Christmas Eve was by far my favourite. We would make special reindeer food with a mixture of glitter and oats.

As I am sure you will all know, it takes a special Christmas spell to make them sparkle so that the reindeer can see it from the sky, and that spell has to be rewritten every year by an excited child on Christmas Eve. Once the reindeer dust was made, the kids would write their spell and then write Santa and Rudolph a thank you card and then it was sprinkling time.

While they sprinkled they read their spell out over the dust. From there, it would be hot chocolates and we would read Twas The Night Before Christmas.

That's one story that we never missed no matter what. Traditions change throughout the years, but my parents always read that to us on Christmas Eve, and I really wanted that to be part of our family traditions as well.

Hopefully it may be something that they do with their own kids when they get to that point as well.

If not, thats what Grandma can be for!

The last thing we did before bedtime was putting out treats for Santa and Rudolph.

Because the reindeers do most of the driving, Santa was allowed a small Baileys with his mince pie - just to warm him through properly. (Insert winky face here).

There would be a carrot for Rudolph, and the kids would leave their thank you card with everything.

And then it was bedtime, and two very excited kids would try desparately to get to sleep before Santa arrived while I desperately tried to wrap everything before it got so late that I would be left knackered the next day!

(You see the running theme here of not being prepared!)

So you see, for me, I always thought it was me creating the magic. The reality is, it never was.

The magic came from them and their pure, innocent and incredible belief in the big man in the red suit and his magic reindeer.

It came from them loving the build up. It came from visiting Fenwicks window, going to see Christmas lights and picking presents for family. It came from belly laughs caused by naughty elves and concentrating hard to make sure their spells would make the dust sparkle.

It came from spending time with family. From the love, laughter and togetherness that seems to be embraced so much easier at this time of year.

It came from watching Home Alone and Elf and from reading stories like The Night Before Christmas.

It came from reading The Christmas Story on Christmas morning and them understanding that the season is not really about what you get, but actually about what you give and that the greatest gift you can give is yourself.

It came from love, from family and from precious time that flies past faster than you can even begin to imagine. Those moments that you think will last forever disappear quicker than you can imagine, and those kids that you wished would grow up are all of a sudden way too old and all you want is to bring back the magic that you shared at Christmas.

Don't worry though musers. I am not maudlin at all, contrary to how it may sound. What I am learning is that the magic doesn't go. It just adapts and changes if you let it.

Christmas is the very definition of magic, and when those little people who created the magic for you are 'all growed up' and the dynamics have changed, you have to make your own magic.

I promise though, its there if you look for it.

Its there in the choirs singing at the shops. There is something quite beautiful about standing listening to carolers, whether its outside or inside.

Its there in the sparkle of the Christmas lights around the streets, and the beautiful tree's in people's windows.

If you are anything like me, its there in almost every bauble that you put on your tree. Every bauble tells a story of the last 26 years of my life with my kids.

Its there in the eyes of your family, and even those kids who are all grown up will still have that Christmas twinkle in their eyes when they come to see you during December. They can't help it because they know, no matter how old they are, they will always be your little people and that means presents!

Its there in the way the stars sparkle just a little bit more because the sky is so much darker. You could almost believe in magic when you look up to a sky like that. Its there in christmas films that you watch together or alone.

If you want it, its there. But you have to be willing to look for it.

Christmas is tough when you are on your own. There is no denying that. This time of year is a hard one for so many people and I know personally just how lonely it can feel. For those of us who aren't, it's important to remember that. If you're able to share a little bit of that Christmas magic with those people around you who may need it, it could make more of a difference then you will ever really understand.

This year I will be celebrating Christmas day with the Browell and my small child who is coming for dinner. Large child spends Christmas day at home with his fiancee and the doogles.

Rude. I know. But what can you do!

Yes, its a very different day for me now, but actually, I am really looking forward to it. Alex is a grown man with his own life and that makes me very proud.

So for me, that means me and the mister are responsible for making our own Christmas magic.

It starts with a weekend away to chill at a hot tub lodge, something I couldn't have done when the kids are younger. (Hot tub yes, relax - definitely not!) From there, there are grown up Christmas parties and a grown up Christmas eve where I will still be putting out Santa's mice pie and baileys. After all, you can't be too sure! In amongst the adult stuff I wouldn't have been able to do, there will be kids stuff thrown in with Tony's 6 year old like a visit to Santa today, reindeer dust and magic spel. Maybe, if I can find them, there might even be naughty elves.

This year, its definitely going to be the best of both worlds, and instead of focussing on what isn't there, I plan on making the magic with everything that is.

Happy 1st December musers. I for one am rather excited to see where December goes this year! Right now though, its 4:22am and I reckon that means its finally time for some shut eye.

Until next time.........